My whole note writing life has been a lie! For the past 20+ years I’ve been signing letters with some variation of “xo”. Sometimes with an emphasis on “x”s, sometimes the emphasis on “o”s –all depending on the intent of my note closure. Confident in the way I was handing out penned hugs and kisses, I’ve carelessly x’d my little heart out (often excluding the jezebel “o”s completely), thinking that I was sending out tons of huggable love. But no. At 33, I have learned that all of these years, I have been wrong.
We were watching Nacho Libre over the weekend when Jack Black’s character narrated a letter he wrote to his Nun-crush that ended in a series of “xxooxxoXooo”s, which he read one-by-one..”hug- hug-kiss-kiss- hug…”. I commented to the BF, “They screwed up. He’s reading it backwards. The x’s are supposed to be the hugs and the o’s for the kisses. Duh.” To which BF says, “Ummm, no they didn’t.”
“Yes!”, I say. “The ‘x’ is for the crossing of the hugging bodies and the “o” is for the kissing mouth.”
“Noooo”, BF remarks, “the “o”s are for the arms wrapping around someone and the “x” is for marking the kissable spot.”
“Seriously?”, I say. “But all of my life I’ve been writing it the opposite way.”
“Seriously.”, he says.
This realization has me cataloguing every letter, note and e-mail I’ve ever written. Is is because I signed a note “xx” (what I thought to be, hug-hug) to the boy in 4th grade who was clearly “just a friend”, that he suddenly asked me to “go around” with him? Surely the actuality of my “kiss-kiss” verbiage must’ve thrown him! Would signing “oo”, which looks vaguely like boobs BTW, have been any less confusing? Does the fact that I across the board, tend to use more “x”s than “o”s make me seem less warm and more hussy-like? Seriously people, I’m totally a hugger! Furthermore, is the inner turmoil caused by this newfound clarity, evidence of some sort of lack of social maturity on my part?
I do not know, friends. I. Do. Not. Know.
That is all.